Showing posts with label Hurting. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Hurting. Show all posts

Monday, May 13, 2013

Mother's Day

"Happy Mother's Day to the best mother I could ever ask for!" "On this day, I wish to give thanks to my mother for giving me guidance all throughout my life!" "To the best mother in the world, I hope you are able to enjoy this day. You deserve it!"

As I open up Facebook, these are the types of postings that flood my news feed. Whilst reading though them, I feel myself growing jealous, angry, and even depressed. I'm happy for the people that are able to sincerely pay tribute to their mothers, but I also tend to covet them at the same time.

In 1999, I was nearing the end of my 3rd grade year. It had been a particularly difficult year for me. You see, this had been my first year at a new school. There were very few people I liked, and even less that I considered friends.

My teacher, Mrs. Weaver, wanted to throw a Mother's Day celebration. We were to invite our mother's to come in and we would share our love for them with our class. I was very excited to go home and invite my mom to come in and enjoy the day with us. I told my mother about it and she said she would try to get off work early enough to make it.

The next couple of days in class, we spent time making gifts. One of them was a felt black bear holding a heart with our school picture in the center of the heart. I was very proud of this, and couldn't wait to give it to my mom during our celebration.

I made sure to remind my mom often about the celebration at my school. I couldn't wait to give her the things I had made and hoped she would be as proud to receive them as I was to make them. She assured me that she would try her best to make it there.

The day had finally come to celebrate our mothers and give them our gifts. One after one, each student's mom walked in. Through each passing shadow, I hoped to see my mom walk through the door.

Time grew on, and I continued to anxiously await the arrival of my mother...she never showed up.

"She must have got stuck at work." I thought to myself.

So that I wouldn't feel left out, Mrs. Weaver asked an assistant teacher to be my 'stand-in' mother. I hated seeing all of the other kids being so happy with their moms and having fun showing them their gifts. I remember wishing my mom never started working so she could have been there.

At the end of the day, my teacher told me to take my gift home to my mother. She said that she would still love to see it.

As I walked home, I held my felt bear. I couldn't wait to give it to my mom when she got home from work.

When I walked in the door, she was already home. I was confused, but maybe she had just got there. I reminded her that we had the Mother's Day celebration at school that day and she said she forgot about it.

The more she talked, the quicker I realized that she was drunk. I distinctly remember going into my room and crying for hours. "Why does she have to drink so much?" "Why couldn't she love me enough to not drink for just one day?" The more the questions streamed through my head and the tears down my face the more I hated her.

Since then, I have had a few stand-in mothers. A few women in my life that have been there through the ups and downs. We've shared laughter and tears. A few women, to whom I a truly thankful for.

I wish I had time to give individual praise to each of these women. Without them, I'd be even more lost than I currently am. Alison SilverRaven, Stefanie Scott, Kathy Trusty, and Aunt Karen; You all mean more to me than I could ever adequately express. Thank so much for being there with me through the thick and thin, the good times and the bad, you are truly a blessing sent from God. I love you!

Tuesday, January 24, 2012

Incomplete Work

 Do you ever begin a task with every intention of completing it but never actually getting around to doing so? Yea...me too. It can be quite frustrating at times. Often times I go so far as feeling the sense of being a failure due to the inability to complete a predetermined task. Why is it that we do this? Why are we able to start something with every intention to finish it, yet we don't? I have a few ideas.

 I've noticed a pattern in my incomplete assignments. It's not lack of motivation, it's not lack of interest, and it certainly isn't lack of ability. What it tends to be for me is the lack of gathering the necessary materials.

 No matter what you are trying to complete, there is always a list of pre-task materials. If you're writing a blog or a paper, you should gather your thoughts on paper before engaging. If you are painting a room, you should be sure and have enough paint, brushes, and plastic coverings so you don't ruin your carpet. If you are building a dresser, you might want to be sure to have the right amount of wood as well as the proper tools in your shed.

 I feel like the same thing happens in our walk with Christ. We may, from time to time, set out fully motivated to BE the Church as we are called to do. So why don't we? It goes back to what I was saying about the carnal tasks we set out to do. Lack of starting material.

 If we wish to fully extend our reach to the depths of the hurting and the dens of the needy, then we must be fully prepared. We must engage in Bible reading, we should be sure to be ready for all attacks of Satan, and we might want to be open and caring enough to love everybody equally.

 When we adequately prepare ourselves we cannot and will not be stopped. So with that, I ask of you, are you preparing yourself? Is there a reason your tasks stay incomplete more often than not? I challenge you to prepare your body, mind, and soul. Then let's see how much we can complete.


James 2:17 In the same way, faith by itself, if it is not accompanied by action, is dead.